A Brief Post About Mam's Funeral

My Mam’s funeral was on August 22nd - three weeks to the day after she died.

 

It was a nice service, and – though there were some people who I wish had been able to come who weren’t able to – I’m pleased with who showed up, and some of those who couldn't make it sent flowers, which was nice.

 

The polebearers were my brothers, Wayne and Carl, my honorary cousin, Natalie, and a family friend who Mam was close to named Lee.  And I followed behind them with Mam’s Goddaughter, Shireen.

 

We had three songs played for Mam:

Elvis Presley – You Are Always On My Mind (because she loved Elvis Presley, and liked that song)

A version of Amazing Grace she’d particularly requested when she learned she was so sick

Dolly Parton – Shine Like The Sun (because she was particularly identifying with that song towards the end)

 

I’d planned on speaking, but in the end couldn’t do it, so had them share the following quote on my behalf:

 

It is a curious thing, the death of a loved one. We all know that our time in this world is limited, and that eventually all of us will end up underneath some sheet, never to wake up. And yet it is always a surprise when it happens to someone we know. It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark, and thinking there is one more stair than there is. Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment of dark surprise as you try and readjust the way you thought of things.

~Lemony Snicket

 

Wayne couldn’t bring himself to speak either.  Carl did speak though, and used these two quotes in what he said:

 

Picture a wave in the ocean. You can see it, measure it — its height, the way the sunlight refracts when it passes through. It’s there and you can see it and you know what it is. It’s a wave. And then it crashes on the shore, and it’s gone. But the water is still there. The wave was just a different way for the water to be, for a little while. That’s one conception of death for a Buddhist. The wave returns to the ocean  — where it came from, and where it’s supposed to be.

~The Good Place

 

"If I die," he whispered in the dark, "dinna follow me. The bairns will need ye. Stay for them. I can wait."

~Outlander

 

 

Rest in peace, and goodbye, Mam.

#Ocean Views + Adorable #Dogs + #BonfireNight #Fireworks + My Lockdown Birthday

    

The above photo shows the view of the ocean that can be seen from our building, and was taken on November 1st 2020.  Logan was admiring the view (and barking at things going by) while I was taking the photo, so I got a couple of photos of him at the same time.  Here they are:

    

~ 

     

Speaking of pet photos... 

     

I have a couple of photos from me getting a hug from Logan, and some kisses from Lilie, which were taken on the evening of November 11th, just because Kelly thought Logan cuddling me looked cute, and then Lilie wanted a turn for some attention.  Here they are:

     

*~*~* 

    

There were a LOT of fireworks being set off on and around Bonfire Night.  I'm not really surprised, since people were trying to make up for not being able to go to displays because of restrictions on what events could be held, and the fact lockdown hit on that day here in England. 

     

~ 

    

I was very proud of the petkids.  I mean, we had a good five hours of fireworks on Bonfire Night itself, as well as an hour or more every night for several days both before and after November 5th, and most of them they ignored.  Well, OK, since she dug in for the night shortly before they started, I'm not sure Artemis was even aware they existed.  But, either way, Mollie did get a little upset briefly during some especially loud and close ones, and the dogs did both bark a few times (again, at some especially loud and close ones) but mostly they managed to ignore them.  Even Logan - the more nervous of the dogs - was able to mostly ignore the fireworks.  Plus, all three were easily soothed and calmed back down quickly. 

     

Well, except the Saturday after Bonfire Night, when I swear people had saved up some of the loudest fireworks in the world and were letting them off on the seafront across from our building, causing me to end up singing to the dogs to calm them down for so long I was starting to lose my voice by the time it was safe to stop (every time I stopped singing before that the dogs would get upset again).  But the least said about that evening the better.  I just hope the neighbours like my singing as much as the dogs do... Then again, since we're moving soon, I don't suppose it really matters.

     

I feel sorry for those people who didn't have the same luck with their own furry family members, since I know the roughly week long setting off of fireworks was happening across most of the UK, and a lot of animals weren't too happy about it - including the other dogs living in this building. 

     

~ 

    By the way, we got a short video of the fireworks, so here's a tiny sample of them for you, complete with some barking from Lilie in the background during the first part of the video, since these were some of the ones that apparently deserved to be barked at.  Anyway, enjoy!

    

*~*~* 

    

It was my birthday last Friday, and my birthday wish had been for a final trip to Oscars before we move out of the area.  The people who own it have become friends, and I love their food, so I wanted to have it one more time, and also say, "Goodbye," to them. 

     

~ 

     

We're avoiding take-away right now because of moving expenses, and have avoided actually eating in cafes in person most of this year (even when the dogs were at the groomer in the Summer we ate food to go, rather than going to a cafe).  But I kept the money aside especially for something nice for my birthday meal, and - since I know I can trust them to be careful - was going to make an exception on the eating out rule to go to Oscars one more time before we move away from the area.

     

Of course, with the latest lockdown starting about a week before my birthday, that wasn't an option any more. 

     

I thought the lockdown was going to cost me my birthday meal from Oscars, which I wouldn't have minded quite so much, except that not only do I consider them friends, but it might have also meant it cost me my last chance to have food from them - unless we come back to this area for a visit at some point and they happen to still be there, but who knows when, or even if, that might happen. 

     

Luckily, Oscars has remained open for pick-up and delivery during the lockdown though, so Kelly was able to go pick me up something from them, so I didn't have to miss out on my birthday meal after all, and got to enjoy a birthday jackfruit po'boy - or however you spell that... It's a sandwich, basically - with chips (fries) from Oscars on my birthday. 

     

~ 

     

I'd have gone with Kelly to fetch it, but with the lockdown restrictions, that's just not practical on days with bad weather, which my birthday was... A lot of days have been quite stormy here lately.

     

Since I couldn’t go and say, “Goodbye,” in person while having my birthday meal, we’re going to try and take a walk down there right before we move so I can do that.  Plus, they’d like to see Lilie and Logan one last time before we leave.  They’ve watched them grow up – Lilie especially, since they’ve missed a lot of Logan’s puppyhood because of lockdown – and would like to say, “Goodbye,” to them, and see them once more.  Since they’ve become friends, I’d like to be able to see them once more in person too, so we’re hoping to go down and see them once lockdown lifts, even if it will just be a quick farewell visit.  I’m going to miss them, and not just for the food, though I’ll certainly miss that.

   

~ 

     

 

I’d like to thank everyone for all the birthday messages.  I was blown away by just how many I got this year.  They were all very much appreciated, and helped to make my birthday awesome.  Even more so because the day before my birthday I was feeling low because I figured my birthday would go by largely unnoticed between all the moving stuff and lockdown meaning I couldn’t really do much for my birthday – not that I do usually do much, but the fact the choice was taken away really got to me, especially after no longer having the Jason Donovan concert to look forward to.  So to get several cards, some money, and a couple of presents, and then end up spending most of my birthday and some of the weekend after it responding to birthday messages (seriously... They were still coming in on Monday) was a huge help, and made my lockdown birthday a wonderful one after all.  So, once again... Thank you!

     

~ 

     

For those who'd like to see them, here are photos of my birthday cards: 

     

Though this is likely not the order they will appear... I had one from my Mam, one from Rita and her cat, Annie, one from my Dad, one from my honorary cousin, Natalie, and one from my Grandma (Mam's Mother, obviously, since the other one is no longer with us).  I also had one from Kelly and the pedkids. 

    

~ 

     

Kelly and I don't usually exchange cards, but I asked Lilie the day before my birthday what she'd gotten me, and she got so upset when nothing was produced.  She hung her head and put her ears back, and ran to Kelly with a little whimper.  I told her it was fine, and I love her even if she forgot my birthday, but she kept coming to me with her ears back to give me tentative kisses like she does to ask for forgiveness when she's been scolded.  So Kelly fetched a birthday card from up the road for them to give me, which made Lilie happy.  She's so sweet! 

     

~ 

     

Because of trying to move, I have an I.O.U. on a gift from Kelly and the petkids, but Kelly brought me a bottle of pop when he was getting my card, to make Lilie feel better about me being given something.  He would have gotten me chocolate, but they were out of vegan chocolate.  Luckily, the card and bottle of pop were enough to satisfy Lilie, who returned to her happy waggy-tailed self afterwards.

     

My other presents were a scented candle and an electric vegetable peeler from my Mam. 

     

Everyone else gave me money, at my request.  I'll buy myself something nice after the moving is over. 

    

~ 

     I made my own birthday cake this year. 

    

I was going to make a lemon one, but forgot to get lemons, and didn't have any bottled lemon juice on hand, so I just made a ginger one instead. 

     

It's a two layer cake with butter cream icing between the layers, more butter cream icing on top, and cherries to decorate it.  All 100% vegan, of course.  Here's a photo:

    *~* 

    

P.S. We might have a place.  A viewing happened yesterday.  If everything checks out we'll make it for moving this side of Christmas, though only just.  Cross your fingers, toes, and anything else you want to cross, or whatever you do to bring people good luck.  Basically, all positive thoughts welcome.

Happy Birthday To Me And You - 2016 Edition (FD)

It was my birthday two weeks ago, as many of you already knew. So, first of all, I'd like to thank those of you who sent me gifts or cards, as well as those of you who sent me birthday messages via eMail or on Facebook to wish me a happy birthday. Your birthday wishes are very much appreciated, as are the cards and gifts I got from those who sent things, of course. Yeah, I know it's taken me a couple of weeks to get to this post... I had other things I wanted to post about first. Anyway, as I said, thanks to everyone who sent me birthday wishes in some shape or form.

Speaking of which, here are a couple of photos of my birthday cards:

Excuse them being on top of the freezer... It was the place with the best light on that day, apparently.

Mostly I got money for my birthday, which I spent on books and movies. But I also got some NCIS DVDs (seasons one to nine of the original NCIS) and a nifty chopping board that bends to form a sort of funnel shape so you can transfer things from it to bowls or pots more easily. The scarf I'm wearing in this photo was a birthday present too...

If I have any strange expressions on my face in the above photo, it's because it was taken while I was in the process of explaining to Kelly how taking a photo with my phone works, since it apparently takes clearer pictures than our camera, but he's not familiar with how to use iPhones. He says he caught me at a good moment, so I hope that's the case.

Apparently I'm so awesome that someone arranged for fireworks for my birthday too!

OK, not really. I mean, there were fireworks... Not many, and we didn't get photos, but there were. They didn't actually have anything to do with me though. Still, I enjoyed them, and I can pretend, right?

Anyway... I didn't do much for my birthday. Lorna came around for a cup of tea and a chat the day before, Kelly made me a "special birthday dinner" the day after, and I had cake on my actual birthday... It was a lemon cake. But that's about it. Still, it was a pretty good birthday, as birthdays go. Or, I think so.

But I'm not the only one with a birthday in November!

Some of our family friends and online friends have birthdays during November, along with a few family members and honorary family members. I already mentioned during the second half of last month that Iggy's birthday was at the start of the month, but there were others too. I'm not going to list everyone, but among those celebrating their birthdays this month are Kelly's sister, Sherry, who celebrated her birthday this past Tuesday (November 22nd) and my Mam's Goddaughter, Shireen, who will be celebrating her 18th birthday on November 30th.

That last one makes me feel even older than having my own birthday did, since I remember caring for Shireen as a tiny baby I could hold in just one arm. Now she's about to turn 18, and is actually taller than me. How did that happen? Where did the years go? How can that little baby I remember rocking to sleep be all grown up? It seems like only yesterday her sweet little gummy smiles were making me smile, and her little hands were reaching out to try and grab at the toys atatched to the bar of her bouncer chair. Yet here she is, about to turn 18. I know that logically the years didn't zoom past in the time it took to blink. But, at times like this, it sure feels like that's what happened.

Anyway...

If you're a November baby too... Happy birthday to you!