Sunday, February 07, 2010

Joke: Lady phones her local hospital

A 75 Year Old Lady rings her local NHS hospital and this conversation follows:

"Hello I'd like some information on a patient, Mrs Tiptree. She was admitted last week with chest pains and I just want to know if her condition has deteriorated, stabilised or improved?"

"Do you know which ward she is in?"

"Yes, ward P, room 2B"

"I'll just put you through to the nurse station."

"Hello, ward P, how can I help?"

"I would just like some information on a patient, Mrs Tiptree, I was wondering if her condition had deteriorated, stabilised or improved?"

"I'll just check her notes. I'm pleased to say that Mrs Tiptree's conditioned has improved. She has regained her appetite, her temperature has steadied and after some routine checks tonight, she should be well enough to go home tomorrow."

"Oh that's wonderful news, I'm so happy, thank you ever so much!"

"You seem very relieved, are you a close friend or relative?"

"No, I'm Mrs Tiptree in room 2b. Nobody tells you f**k all in here!"


MarmiteToasty said...

oh for goodness sake LMFAO hahaha


AliceKay said...


Deanna said...

lmao sad but true... am going to remember that next time I am in the hospital.

Dorkys Ramos said...

Ha! Awesome tip! I'll remember to call around if I'm ever in Mrs. Tiptree's shoes myself.

G said...

Just like the government....thanks for the morning chuckle.

Intense Guy said...


And I bet you really related to this too!

Toriz said...

*Nods at Iggy*